Author Archives: Loretta

Throw Like a Girl

Posted by Dec 12, 2014 Uncategorized , , , , , Leave a Comment

That used to be a pejorative jab.

If someone said you threw like a girl, ran like a girl, or did anything like a girl, that person had just hit you with a major insult. Now, thirteen-year-old Mo’ne Davis has taken that insult and wrapped it around herself in triumph.

Mo’ne indeed throws like a girl. A girl who fires a 70-mile-an-hour fastball, strikes out batters, abaseball-25761_1280nd pitches the first-ever shutout by a girl in Little League World Series history. I watched in amazement along with many others as Mo’ne Davis and the Taney Dragons of Philadelphia marched through the summer of 2014 straight into the Little League World Series. Like a true leader, she deflected much of the praise directed her way back toward her teammates. Yet she knows that girls and boys of all ages look up to her, and she embraces that role.

The first Little Leaguer ever featured on the cover of Sports Illustrated, Mo’ne also threw the ceremonial first pitch (a strike, natch) before Game 4 of the MLB World Series, marched in New York City’s Thanksgiving Day parade, and was named SportsKid of the Year by Sports Illustrated Kids. Director Spike Lee created a commercial and documentary film about her. Albert Chen, who wrote the Sports Illustrated cover story said, “She’s a lot of things to a lot of different people, all of them good things: a totem for inner-city baseball, a role model for your 10-year-old niece, a role model for your 10-year-old nephew.”

Adults and teens alike can all learn invaluable lessons from Mo’ne.

Be Fearless.

Mo’ne started playing baseball, soccer, and basketball when she was seven years old. Steve Bandura, the local youth league coach, saw her tossing a football with some older boys and invited her to practice with the boys’ basketball team. After watching the seven-year-old master drills she had never before attempted, he knew she had the potential to be a special athlete. Later he invited her to join the Anderson Monarchs baseball team. Although she had never practiced basketball drills or worn a baseball glove, Mo’ne accepted Bandura’s challenges.

Work Hard.

Mo’ne won a scholarship to Springside Chestnut Hill Academy, where today she is on the honor roll. She commutes more than an hour each way to get to school, takes classes, and participates in three sports. Then, after arriving at home as late as 7 p.m., you know she must put in major study time to keep up her grades. Obviously, Mo’ne is gifted. But she doesn’t take those gifts for granted. She works hard to get better and better each day.

Set Your Sights High.

As talented as she is in baseball and soccer, Mo’ne says her best sport is basketball. As she proclaimed to the world dbasketball-158875_1280uring one of the many interviews she granted during the LLWS, Mo’ne would like to play basketball at the University of Connecticut—a women’s basketball powerhouse. Eventually, she would like to play in the WNBA, the women’s professional basketball league. For now, this remarkable eighth grader is playing varsity for the Springside girls’ high school basketball team.

And, oh yeah, she’s sinking three pointers like a girl.

Do you have a dream that you’ve been afraid to pursue?

It’s not too late. Go for it!

Where There’s Smoke . . .

Posted by Dec 5, 2014 Uncategorized , , , , Leave a Comment

I’ve always been afraid of fire. I have a particular fear of dying in a fire.

Some years ago, we had a small fire in the laundry room of the apartment building where I lived. I was never in serious danger, but I will never forget the choking, burning sensation in my throat and lungs as I crept through smoky hallways down three flights of stairs to the fresh air outside.

fire-fighter-278012_1280I often wonder about people who become firefighters. Do they overcome the fear? Or does their training keep them so focused on the job that they manage to keep the fear at bay?

I’ve been thinking about this a lot recently. I saw a story about a seventeen-year-old who pulled a police officer from his burning car on November 8.  Joe Chambers, a high school senior and volunteer firefighter from Delaware County, Pennsylvania, was visiting his sister in Philadelphia when he heard a crash. He said he immediately knew it was a car accident. A quick look out the window was enough for Joe to spot the spark of a fire.

At least one other Good Samaritan teamed up with Joe to extricate Officer Mark Kimsey from his car. The door wouldn’t open, so the teen and the other man pulled the officer out through a window and carried him to safety only moments before flames engulfed the vehicle.

Kimsey was responding to an emergency call. He had his lights flashing and siren blaring when he collided with a pickup truck. Joe and twenty-four-year-old Dante Johnson also pulled that driver from his vehicle.

Joe says “human instinct” kicked in. But I know my instinct would have been to stay out of harm’s way. I’m sure I would have called 911, but I don’t think I would run toward a fire to save a stranger.

I think Joe is a hero. Councilman David J. Wright thinks so too.  In a resolution honoring Joe Chambers for his actions, the Delaware County Council resolution declares that “the bravery of a young hero like this shines as a bright inspiration to all.”

Amen!

How do you think you would respond if you were called on to risk your personal safety for another person?

Do you know someone personally who acted heroically in a dangerous situation?

Giving Thanks

Posted by Nov 25, 2014 Uncategorized , , , , , , , , , , Leave a Comment

I’m a writer, not a talker. While my family and friends would dispute that statement, it’s true when it comes to moments requiring profound insights, wisdom sharing, or witty comebacks. Every year on Thanksgiving Day, I become tongue-tied when it’s time to say what I am thankful for. In fact, no one in my family is very good at expressing thanks on command in front of the turkey.

But I am profoundly thankful.

“I am grateful for what I am and have.”—Henry David Thoreau 

The First Thanksgiving at Plymouth, 1914, Jennie Augusta Brownscombe Pilgrim Hall Museum, Plymouth, Massachusetts

The First Thanksgiving at Plymouth, 1914,
Jennie Augusta Brownscombe
Pilgrim Hall Museum, Plymouth, Massachusetts

I look back on my childhood and remember countless Thanksgiving Days when we needed two or three tables to accommodate the grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins who came together.

This year, we have only four people around our table. But one of those people is my feisty, independent 93-year-old mother. I am so thankful to have her with me for so many years. As an only child, I often felt that I had too much motherly attention. But I now know you can never have too much love.

She taught me to believe in myself and to go after what I wanted. She once told me she wanted to be a writer. She said she won a pencil for a story she wrote in grade school. But her parents were Italian immigrants who struggled to put food on the table each day. My mom and her sisters had to leave school so they could work in the fields as day laborers.

I am who I am today in large part because of my mother.

“Be present in all things and thankful for all things.”—Maya Angelou 

Being “present” can be difficult. We have so many things competing for our attention. I sometimes find myself scanning e-mail or sorting mail while I am on the phone. The next thing I know, the conversation has ended, and I have no idea what we discussed. The same thing can happen in face-to-face conversations. I’m so busy thinking up how I will respond, I’m not fully listening to the person in front of me.

For the coming year, I will work to be more present to and thankful for every person I meet each day.

“Give thanks for unknown blessings already on their way.”–Native American Proverb

This profound Native American saying seems particularly apt. The first day of thanksgiving in America took place in the autumn of 1621 when the Pilgrims and the Wampanoag joined to celebrate the colony’s first successful harvest. Later, President Abraham Lincoln established Thanksgiving as a national holiday to be celebrated on the fourth Thursday in November.

We don’t know what life will bring us. So often we fear the future and possible illnesses, losses, and disasters. How much easier it becomes to live each day when we remember that the future also holds unknown blessings. For this, and more, we should be grateful.

What are you thankful for?

Who are you thankful for?

Say thank you to someone special today. Tell them exactly why you are grateful to have them in your life.

Father and Daughter: To Infinity . . . and Beyond

Posted by Nov 19, 2014 Uncategorized , , , , , Leave a Comment

No. I’m not writing about Buzz Lightyear.

I saw Interstellar last weekend. For the most part, I enjoyed this family-friendly movie in which the logic of science and the power of love intersect.

With all the talk about wormholes, black holes, relativity, and tesseracts, the film never talks down to anyone. It’s challenging, confounding, and tugs at the heartstrings without becoming maudlin. While the film showcases some pretty amazing cinematography, at its heart, Interstellar is an intimate father/daughter story with the fate of humanity at stake. Two women play central roles as brilliant scientists, and the guys aren’t half-bad either. How cool is that?

What I especially loved about the film is that the young daughter of our intrepid hero (played by Matthew McConaughey) is the catalyst who spurs her father to action. She’s convinced a ghost is haunting her bedroom. Her father at first rebuffs her, but she’s persistent, convincing, and passionate. Eventually he tells her to document her experience. To act like a “real scientist.” Her discovery and how that connects to her father’s intergalactic journey add a human dimension to a movie heavy on science and technology.

NASA / Dana Berry / SkyWorks Digital

NASA / Dana Berry / SkyWorks Digital

I’ve read that the director and screenwriter took great pains to get the science right. I’m not going to pretend I understand all the science, so I’ll leave the debates about what was right and wrong to people who do. I’m pretty sure some of the speculative stuff was a cross between mumbo-jumbo and voodoo.

That’s okay. Ultimately what engaged me was the story of Murphy, who sets out on her journey to become a scientist because her father takes her seriously. She doesn’t take his first no as his final answer.

Has anyone’s faith in you ever spurred you to face a challenge?

Have you seen Interstellar? What do you think? Does the razzle-dazzle help you ignore the plot holes? Does the intergalactic adventure upstage the inner journey?

Staring Down the Ultimate Opponent

Posted by Nov 8, 2014 Uncategorized , , , , , , , , , Leave a Comment

On November 2, a nineteen-year-old freshman on the women’s basketball team from Mount St. Joseph University scored the first official points of the 2014/2015 college basketball season. Normally the world would take little notice of a Division III college basketball game, let alone a Division III women’s basketball game.

girl-171207_1280But this was different. The NCAA moved the game up by two weeks because that freshman, Lauren Hill, has a rare and incurable form of brain cancer that doctors say will most certainly kill her before the end of the year. In a recent interview, Lauren said when her doctor told her last year that she had, at most, two years to live, she was breathless “for a couple minutes.”

A couple of minutes? News like that would knock me out for a good long time, I think. But this young teen asked only if she could continue playing basketball. And continue she did for the rest of her senior year in high school, through radiation treatments, experimental chemotherapy, and worsening symptoms.

5548637946_6ceaa3f62f_b

https://www.flickr.com/photos/swimparallel/5548637946/

But Lauren had loftier goals. She was determined to play in at least one college game.

To date, Lauren has received the Pat Summitt Most Courageous Award from former Tennessee head coach Pat Summitt—a woman who also understands something about facing adversity, having been forced to end her own career to fight a battle with Alzheimer’s. Lauren’s picture is on a special-edition Wheaties box, and she’s received countless messages from ordinary people and athletes like basketball superstars Elena Delle Donne and LeBron James.

But Lauren isn’t taking this journey for the accolades. She’s taking it because, when she received her diagnosis in 2013, a doctor told her that pediatric brain cancer “needed a face.” Lauren has become that face, through the Cure Starts Now Foundation and the Layup 4 Lauren Challenge.

Lauren knows that she cannot avoid death forever. But it is clear that this inspiring young woman will not go gentle into that good night.

What is the toughest challenge you’ve ever faced?

Malala Is Only One Person

Posted by Nov 1, 2014 Uncategorized , , , , , , , , Leave a Comment

You can say the same. I can say the same of myself. On our own, we are only one. However, if we each do what we can to make the world a better place, what could we accomplish?

By now, I imagine everyone knows Malala Yousafzai’s story. As a young girl, she defied the Taliban in her native country of Pakistan by attending school and demanding that all girls be afforded the same educational opportunities as boys.

Photo by Russell Watkins/Department for International Development. - https://www.flickr.com/photos/dfid/14714344864/

Photo by Russell Watkins/Department for International Development. – https://www.flickr.com/photos/dfid/14714344864/

At only 11 years old, she gave a speech in Pakistan, “How dare the Taliban take away my basic right to education?” When she was 12, she began blogging about her experiences.

She continued to speak out even after the Taliban shot and nearly killed her. For her courage and “struggle against the suppression of children and young people and for the right of all children to education,” she was a co-recipient of the 2014 Nobel Peace Prize.

How many of us face literal threats of death for speaking our minds? I know that I am sometimes afraid to speak my mind when all I have to fear is a lost friendship. Where did Malala—where does anyone—summon the courage to speak out in the face of death?

That question sent me on a search for other extraordinary young woman who made a difference at pivotal moments of history. I came across the website for the National Women’s History Museum, an organization honoring the achievements of American women. Currently, the museum has only an online presence. Its goal is to build a brick-and-mortar building in Washington, DC.

Among its many virtual exhibits about women is “Young and Brave: Girls Changing History.” I had never heard of many of these extraordinary young women. The story that stood out for me concerns the so-called Little Rock Nine. In 1957, these six brave girls and three brave boys also risked their lives for the opportunity to go to school.

Little Rock Nine

http://www.marquette.edu

In the mid-twentieth century, the United States was very much a segregated society. White children and black children attended separate schools. Despite a Supreme Court decision declaring “separate but equal” education unconstitutional, many states balked at integrating their schools. The schools in the State of Arkansas became a flashpoint for the issue when President Dwight Eisenhower called out federal troops to force Little Rock Central High School to admit the nine young black students. The students endured daily verbal and physical attacks. One of the Little Rock Nine students—Minnijean Brown—was expelled because she retaliated against the white students who taunted her.

Yet Minnijean Brown—today Minnijean Brown-Trickey—ultimately received the education she craved, graduating from high school and college. She’s been a teacher, the deputy assistant secretary for workforce diversity at the Department of the Interior, and a tireless advocate for youth leadership and social justice.

Fittingly, Ms. Brown-Trickey also was one of the invited guests to attend the ceremony at which Malala received the Liberty Medal in Philadelphia on October 21, 2014.

Have you ever faced a situation when you had the opportunity to right a wrong? What were the consequences?

Fathers and Daughters

Posted by Oct 24, 2014 Uncategorized , , , , , , , , , , Leave a Comment

So, I’ve decided to take a detour.

I planned to write about Malala Yousafzai because she is a superstar in the inspiring teens universe, and she was just awarded the Nobel Peace Prize and the Liberty Medal. I promise to write about her soon, just not today.

Today is my father’s birthday. He would have been 94 years old. I’ve been thinking about him a lot lately, so I think I should just let it out.

My dad was the crazy product of an Irish-Catholic mother and a German-Lutheran father. His mother gave him his beautiful smile; his love of language, especially poetry; and his Catholic faith. From his dad, he learned that life could sometimes be hard, even unfair, but you just had to do your best and keep moving forward.

After his family and faith, my dad had three loves.

Music

Wolfgang-amadeus-mozart_1-revert

Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart

Hearing a beautiful piece of classical music had the power to brighten even his worst days. He asserted that Germans wrote the best music and said that Mozart was his favorite composer.

When I hit my teens and became, according to him, “mouthy,” I pointed out that Mozart was Austrian. He said, “German. Austrian. Same thing.” I’m not sure the Austrians would agree, but I couldn’t convince Dad of that.

When I was in grade school, the Philadelphia classical music station (WFLN then; WRTI now) had a Saturday morning program featuring the music and biographies of the classical music masters. Dad and I would sit at the kitchen table listening to the show, and he would tell me why the slow movements were his favorites and why the Philadelphia Orchestra was the best in the world.

Dad’s love for classical music did not extend to opera, although late in life he condescended to listen to recordings of operas without the words. I never understood the point of that, but if it made him happy, who was I to criticize him?

Baseball

Cliff_Lee,_philly

Cliff Lee Photo by artolog https://www.flickr.com/people/artolog

Dad’s other love was baseball. He was a lifelong Philadelphian and a diehard Phillies fan. Although I was a girl, because I was his only child, Dad saw no reason why he couldn’t take me to Phillies games. This was pretty radical thinking in the Sixties, at least in our family.

When I was very young, we would take a bus to 21st and Leigh Avenue to the old Connie Mack Stadium. Then the Phillies moved to Veterans Stadium, and we had to take a bus and a train. But we still went, and I continued to fill out the scorecards and aggravate my father by asking lots and lots of questions.

He liked to pay attention to every second of the game. We had to buy our hot dogs, sodas, and other snacks before the game or from the vendors who patrolled the stands. Dad NEVER left his seat once a game began. “You wanted to see the game,” he’d say, when I would beg for ice cream. “Watch the game.”

Chocolate

Chocolate_bunnies

Chocolate Bunnies Domenico Bandiera Photography https://www.flickr.com/people/66135347@N00

My dad’s third love was chocolate. A perfect day was a day when he had chocolate milk for breakfast, chocolate cookies or Tastykakes with lunch, and a chocolate dessert after dinner. Around 9 p.m., he would head for the kitchen to get a bowl of ice cream—chocolate, of course.

Chocolate candy was not safe in our house. Although my mom always bought several bags of candy when Halloween and Easter were on the horizon, invariably, the week before the holiday, she had to go back to the store. Dad had eaten all the Hershey bars, Milky Ways, and chocolate-covered bunnies intended for trick-or-treaters and Easter baskets.

So, Dad, here’s to you. In your honor, I am having chocolate cake and ice cream tonight. Wish you were here to enjoy it with me.

Coda

My all-time favorite novel featuring a father and daughter is To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee. (Heck, that’s my all-time favorite novel, period.) I also love Ramona and Her Father by Beverly Cleary.

What are your favorite stories about your Dad?

What are your favorite novels featuring daughters and their dads?

The Power of One

Posted by Oct 19, 2014 Uncategorized , , Leave a Comment

So often we look at the day or the year or the life ahead of us and think we can’t make it. Whether we’re dealing with the normal difficulties of life or facing extraordinary challenges, so many of us believe we are weak if we ask for help.

friendship-261181_1280But knowing when to ask for help is really a sign of strength. And knowing when to accept help from an unexpected source can mark the beginning of a beautiful friendship.

On October 11 at a cross-country meet in North Dakota, a runner from one high school team stopped to assist an injured competitor from a rival school. I’m not sure what it says about our society that this story has received nationwide attention. I hope it says we want to celebrate the good in humanity and not that such stories are so few and far between that they stand out as extraordinary.

Danielle LeNoue, a runner from Fargo South High School, felt a pop in her knee as she neared the end of the race. She tried to continue walking to the finish line, but the pain was so severe she was unable to do so. After Danielle dropped to the ground, she said a number of runners went right past her.

Who could blame them? They were in the zone. They were on a mission. Perhaps this race represented the culmination of a career or the opportunity to finish with a personal best time. Some of the runners undoubtedly wondered if they should stop. Maybe they weren’t worried about their personal statistics. Maybe they believed it was against the rules to stop. Maybe they figured it was someone else’s responsibility. Maybe they didn’t stop because they had no idea what to do next.

But one runner stopped without thinking about the cost. Melanie Bailey, a competitor from Devils Lake High School, saw another person in pain and wanted to help. Melanie carried Danielle across the finish line. Both local and national reports tout the story as an example of good sportsmanship. But I think the story shows us so much more than the deeper meaning of sports.

It shows us that at any moment, we may be confronted with an opportunity to help or to accept help from another person. We will face a choice to do the right thing or a difficult thing in a moment that may be inconvenient or frightening or dangerous for us. How we respond reveals much about our true character.

Perhaps you are thinking that you are just one person. Perhaps you are wondering what difference one person can make. You may not have many opportunities to take actions that benefit the entire world. However, making a difference in one person’s life—as Melanie did for Danielle—is sometimes all we are called to do. Sometimes, simply showing that we care is more than enough to build a friendship.

Have you ever been faced with an unexpected opportunity to help someone? Did you take that opportunity? Would you make a different choice today?

You Are What You Think You Are

Posted by Oct 11, 2014 Uncategorized , , , , , , , , Leave a Comment

I love collecting quotes: quotes that make me laugh, quotes that make me think, quotes that inspire me. I recently noticed that quite a number of the quotes follow a similar theme: you are what you think you are.

Roman Emperor Marcus Aurelius Antoninus wrote: “Our life is what our thoughts make it.”

American philosopher and psychologist William James wrote, “People by and large become what they think of themselves.”

And in our own time, Apple founder Steve Jobs wrote,
“Have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become.”

All these quotes came to mind this week when I read about Aracely Navarro, a young woman from Denver, Colorado. The story about her valedictory speech at North High School last June is not breaking news—but it’s a timeless story.

Aracely is the youngest child of a single mother who not only had to fight poverty, but she also waged a decade-long battle against cancer. In fact, Maria was fighting cancer when she learned she was pregnant with Aracely. Despite being urged to have an abortion to give herself a better chance at survival, Aracely’s mother chose to continue the pregnancy.

But her challenges, and Aracely’s, did not end there.

Aracely grew up tough, and education was never high on her priority list. As she noted in her graduation speech, her goal as a freshman was to have a “good time,” so she began “cutting class, getting into trouble, and smoking pot.” She said she was “becoming a lost cause. . . . becoming hopeless.”

A suspension from high school, a move to a new school, and some caring teachers helped Aracely turn her life around. Now hope is her word of choice.

Yet even as she earned top grades—grades that eventually made her class valedictorian—Aracely still faced obstacles as she worked toward her new goal of attending college.

Her mother was still ill, and they were still struggling to live from day to day. College seemed to be a dream beyond her reach. With the help of her advisor, she applied for thirty scholarships. She received thirty rejections. With each rejection, Aracely said she cried and started to lose hope.

But each time that happened, she went back to her advisor the next day and continued the search.

Her persistence paid off. Aracely won a grant from the prestigious Gates Millennium Scholars (GMS) program, a grant awarded to 1,000 high school seniors in the United States.

Now Aracely’s worries about money for college have vanished. The GMS scholarship will pay 100% of her undergraduate and graduate school tuition.

And what does Aracely plan to do with this opportunity?foreign-trade-62743_1280

She wants to give hope to people like her mother who suffer from cancer.

Aracely plans to major in environmental policy at Colorado College and devote her life to identifying and eliminating cancer-causing chemicals in the environment.

Not bad for someone who once considered herself a “lost cause.”

Have you ever felt hopeless? Do you think you are a lost cause? How can you turn that around? Who can you turn to for help?

Embrace Your Talents

Posted by Oct 3, 2014 Uncategorized , , , , , , , , Leave a Comment

Don’t you hate those bumper stickers that read something like “My Labrador retriever is smarter than your honor student”?

IMG_2897Although I am most definitely a cat person, I have nothing against Labrador retrievers. But just when did brains and academic achievement become something worthy of ridicule?

Why is it okay to plaster news everywhere about someone’s exploits in sports but it’s considered unseemly to brag about academic achievement?

Maybe the bumper sticker is supposed to be funny. Maybe.

Everyone has gifts and talents. Whether it’s pitching no-hitters or baking cookies, woodworking or hitting high C’s, making friends or making straight A’s, your talents point the way to your future.

Own your talents. Nurture them. Share them.

Which brings me to Suproteem Sarkar. I read about this 17-year-old student in the Philadelphia Inquirer recently. He is definitely someone who embraces his talents. All of them.

revConstitution-Print-C10314518Sarkar studied fencing and classical piano before he began kindergarten. He’s a reporter for his Conestoga High School (Berwyn, PA) newspaper and a member of 45Words. This national, student-run organization “support(s) free speech for students . . . and help(s) students fight censorship.”

In his spare time, Sarkar coauthored two scientific papers on cancer treatments, organized a science club, and raised money for the Children’s Hospital of Pennsylvania cancer center.

Wow. When I read about young people like Sarkar, I am filled with hope for the future.

“How beauteous mankind is! O brave new world, That has such people in’t!”
—William Shakespeare, The Tempest

What are your talents? What is holding you back from sharing them with the world?